For Laughs

Today’s Commentary: Attention Span?

My brain has this thing it does, which I’m sure isn’t really that uncommon. I always have a running commentary in my head; my writer’s voice taking over and beginning some sort of dialogue about the things going on around me. Most of the time, what it comes up with is rather intelligent and quite amusing. It’s almost like I just sit back and let am entirely different being entertain me. Trust me, my writer’s voice can be extremely hilarious. But I suppose that Monday took it’s toll on my writer’s voice this week, because today my commentary was anything but intelligent. It more took on the personality of somebody with a five second attention span ALL day. And c8bbefe92bf34527fa5036fbdc39f6c6being present in my head went something like this:

  • Why is it that we feel we have to do the shuffle run? You are running, but don’t really need to run, yet you feel the need to run, yet you don’t want to look like you are actually running so then you just do the awkward shuffle run. Maybe I’ll start wearing sporty clothes so that the next time this happens to me it looks totally normal to break out in spontaneous activity.
  • Why is this table wobbly? This is totally obstructing my ability to learn. Reading the Essentials of Biology is already draining every ounce of my will to live, and on top of all that this table is wobbly. How I am supposed to cope with this? Really?
  • It is snowing right now. Snowing. Not huge fat flakes, yes, but still there is snow falling from the heavens above. Why am I the only one on this planet wearing a hood? And why do I keep getting weird looks for wearing my hood? Hello, people! In case you haven’t noticed, there is stuff falling on you!
  • If I walk around campus with a briefcase and a thermos, will they let me teach a class? Seriously, I think this is worth looking into. If I was teaching in the same building as my ‘office’ I wouldn’t need a thermos, just a mug of some sort, particularly with a picture or saying on it. Maybe I’ll try this, it seems very promising.
  • In weighing the options of napping vs. getting a head start on my homework, I don’t really know which one I should take. Because obviously, if I do one I cannot really do the other. On the other hand, if I don’t have energy, I won’t be able to manage my time effectively, which is exactly what got me into this predicament in the first place. So obviously I should choose to nap rather than do homework because in the long run I’ll have more time for doing it…..right?

And furthermore, it still hasn’t stopped.

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