Today I want to talk about relationships.
Not necessarily the “I’m so in love with you” kind, but all relationships in general. (Which I realize the love oozing kind does, in fact, fall in that category.)
What do you think the purpose of our relationships is? Why is it so important for us to have friends and family and a significant other? What is the purpose of a work relationship or a school relationship?
What is the point?
Have you ever looked at a specific relationship in your life and realized that the other person is way more important to you than you are to them? Just in case you haven’t, please know that I do not recommend this scenario. It isn’t very fun.
You see, I have this theory about relationships. Any relationship, really, but particularly those with friends and family. Because my view of life is pretty black and white (I either love something or I hate it), if you make it into my life as an important person it means that you are really important. It isn’t in my nature to do anything half-way, and if I happen to do that I get this weird unfinished feeling that I seriously cannot deal with.
It wasn’t until I got a little older that I realized I’m really one of the only people left in the world who views all their relationships in this way. I don’t believe in being a convenience only friend, I don’t believe in being a “just during holidays” family member, and if I’ve brought you into my life that means you are incredibly important to me.
You can understand then, how I might be thrown for a loop when one of my relationships turns out to not be what I thought. When I’m the one pouring love and support into a relationship, whatever kind it may be, and the other person is a convenience friend or a “just during holidays” family member or just incredibly self-centered and shallow.
I have had all three of these experiences with different people in different kinds of relationships lately and it has just really gotten me thinking about the way I view the world.
And the more I come upon parts of my personality like this the more I realize that I’m a living, walking paradox.